How to stop feeling behind, even if life sucks right now

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Last updated on March 18th, 2019 at 06:39 am

When I was studying biochemistry I had to put my studies on hold for a year, because I needed to work to make some money so I can support myself.

I didn’t have the time and capacity to do both at the same time. I was working almost full-time, but I also had to be in the laboratory for 12 hours a day, 5 days a week.

So I just put that semester on hold.

My friends continued as usual and I had to return next year to the class that started a year later.

It was a heavy, heavy feeling. I felt so ashamed. My new fellow students were awesome, but I always had the feeling I’m so behind and I kinda imagined they were talking behind my back.

However I put in the effort, finished university and got my diploma one semester later.

You know what I realized then:

  • Nobody was talking behind my back.
  • Nobody cares when you finish the university as long as you finish.
  • This also will pass

Since then I had many setbacks, many, many things have happened that made me feel behind in my life. On multiple occasions. But, I now learned to welcome these setbacks as opportunities to learn something new. To do something new. I don’t take them as: well, it wasn’t meant to be and to give up. I don’t feel like all is lost.

And I don’t compare myself to everyone else. It’s my life, not theirs. I’m not behind, they’re not ahead. They’re on their own path and I’m on mine.

Nobody, and I mean nobody ever knows how life is supposed to be. There’s no blueprint I need or can follow.

Life is a marathon, kinda

I imagine life as a marathon. But with hurdles along the way. Also, in this marathon, we don’t all start at the same line. Some of us start in the front, some of us are in the back. And the hurdles? Some come earlier along the way, some later. Some are big, others small.

But what do you do in a marathon? You keep moving. If you’re one of the lucky ones, whose start line was forward – be grateful for it and take it as an opportunity to go along the way without looking back to be able to handle the hurdles ahead.

If you start way back, take it as an opportunity to learn as much as you can along the way to be able to handle whatever is ahead. Focus on what you can do now. Not what’s coming or how hard you had it. Focus on what’s now.

Life happens

Whether I like it or not, life doesn’t follow my plans. It just happens, whether I feel behind or not. Even with my blog. It took me 3 years just to start it. I always, even before the start, felt it was already too late. I felt behind.

But then, somehow, I went ahead and started it. I still felt behind though. Looking at all the people who started after me and made 10x more money than me in months. Getting so much more traffic than me. I didn’t know what their secret was. My content was good and I put so much effort.

Then I stopped wondering around. I realized this is another opportunity to learn. And I learned a lot. I took blogging as a learning experience, as an opportunity to grow as a person, to support my family, to connect with others, to learn new skills, to build something that’s mine, to share with others what I’ve learned.

Time spent learning something new is never wasted.

Now that I let this mindset in, my blog is growing and it all seems to fall into place. I’m not worried about making a ton of money, about getting millions of page views and promoting to my audience things I don’t care about, just because someone pays me to. I’m going at my own pace, being true to myself and saying what I want, when I want it.

Of course I set goals, but there’s time for everything.

So whether you want to start a blog, to lose weight, to find love or to start a completely new career – it’s never too late for any of that.

Long story short. If you’re feeling behind – stop comparing yourself to others and stressing about what you don’t have yet or what you haven’t done by now. Focus on what you can do today.

Take this as an opportunity to experience & learn something new. Trust the pace of your own life and enjoy the road. You don’t know what’s coming next.

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